Are you a Happy Homeschool Mom?

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Asalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu ladies, how are you this fine Sunday morning?

As you know, I decided to make a short series discussing different phases/stages we as homeschool moms go through, and even moms in general. Since we covered the ‘apprehensive’ homeschool mom last week, I thought it would be a good idea to move to the other side of the spectrum today and discuss the ‘happy’ homeschool mom.

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Needless to say this is a wonderful phase to be in, and we all hope and pray that this phases never stops!

And this is something every Mom can relate to.  For you may have just started homeschooling, and your heart is bursting with joy knowing that you made the right decision for you and your family.  Or you may be a veteran homeschool mom, whose children are much older now and the fruits of your labour are ripening before your eyes.  Whatever the case may be, its wonderful seeing your children thrive and your homeschool blossom, alhamdulillah.

Thus, it’s important to recognise that the ability and opportunity to teach our children is certainly a blessing from Allah Azzawajal, and this blessing should not be taken for granted. Hence this post is more of a reminder to myself first and foremost and to all my fellow mamas. 

It’s equally important to point out that although these things are something we should acknowledge when we are in this stage, they also are a means of becoming ‘happy’ in the first place.

So lets ensure that we remind ourselves and each to cherish this blessing we have and perhaps implement some of the following things…

Renew intention
I’ve mentioned this before in several other posts and I’ll mention it again for a reason.  See, sometimes its easy to fall into the trap of reminding ourselves of our intentions when things are a little rough, and we need a boost to keep on going. But its important to acknowledge and renew our intentions in time of ease too, not just in times of difficulty.  So take a moment to pause, and renew your intentions for raising your children.  Yes, its a means of bonding with our children and creating memories but there’s more to it than that.  The wider purpose of raising our children to be mumins, pillars of the Ummah and hopefully a sadaqah for us should be at the forefront of our minds at all times.

Make Dua
SubhanAllah, I cannot emphasise this enough!  Motherhood and educating our children is an enormous task and responsibility, none of which would be possible without Allahs mercy upon us.  So its paramount that we ask Allah to keep us sincere and humble in our homeschool journeys and gives us the tawfiq to raise our children upon the Qu’ran and Sunnah. 

Abū Hurayrah ( رضي الله عنه ) that the prophet ( صلّى الله عليه وسلّم ) said:
“Whoever would like Allah to answer him during hardships and difficulties then let him increase in supplication during times of wellbeing.” [Tirmidhi]

It’s also important to acknowledge that one of the characteristics of having istiqamah is to be consistent in our deeds so its essential we make dua for this too.

Abu Hurayrah reported: The Messenger of Allah (صلّى الله عليه وسلّم ) said, “Take up good deeds only as much as you are able, for the best deeds are those done regularly even if they are few.” (Ibn Mājah)

Help others
Alhamdulillah your feeling uplifted, so why not take the opportunity and reach out to others?  Anything from a few words of encouragement, sharing ideas, helping with planning and house organisation really go a long way. Allah Azzawajal is in the aid of a person who aids his brother, so let us grasp this opportunity and hold hands with one another in anyway we can.  When we look to the example of the Prophet Sallahu alayhi wasalam and the noble companions, we find that they were always looking for opportunities to help others, but sometimes as mothers we feel like our opportunities are limited.  But I remind myself and you, my dearest homeschool mama, that a little goes a along way.  Share your blessings in any way you can, for truly we are in the ones in need.

“O My slaves, you will not attain harm in Me so as to harm Me, and you will not attain benefit in Me so as to benefit Me; O My slaves, were the first of you and the last of you, the human of you and the jinn of you to be as pious as the most pious heart of any one man of you, that will not increase My Kingdom in anything; O my slaves, were the first of you and last of you, the human of you and the jinn of you to be as wicked as the most wicked heart of any one man of you, that will not decrease My Kingdom in anything; O My slaves, it is but your deeds that I reckon up for you and I recompense you for. So let him who finds good praise Allaah and let him who finds other than that blame no one but himself.”[Saheeh Muslim]

I hope this post benefited you and that you continue to thrive in your homeschool journeys and feel free to share with sisters who may benefit.
I really enjoy writing about real life Muslim homeschool mom experiences, perhaps I’ll turn them into a podcast one day-sisters only of course!

My advice for the New Homeschool Mom

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Asalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu ladies

I hope you are all well.  We’ve had a cold going around this week, and thus haven’t had a typical homeschool week, alhamdulillah ala kulli haal.

How has your week been?

I often get asked from mothers who have just begun there homeschooling journeys about ‘where to start’.  Or mothers who have started but feel overwhelmed with all the changes.  So I thought I’d share a few tips that may help make that transition easier.

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The Apprehensive Homeschool Mom

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Asalamu Alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu,

How are you, my dear sister?  I hope you’ve had a wonderful week.

So we spoke about the ‘irritated homeschool mom’ some time ago. Now, let’s move onto the ‘apprehensive’ homeschool mom.  You either were an apprehensive homeschool mom, went through a phase of being one, or are currently one right now. The reality is, regardless of whether you had decided to homeschool your children whilst they were still in your womb, didn’t even think of homeschooling and it came out of the blue, or whether you’ve just taken the plunge, we all have moments of apprehension.  At some point or another, you get that niggling feeling telling you that you’re not cut out for this.  Then uncertainty takes over, and lo and behold, you start to panic…

When it comes to the academic side of schooling which others may not think you are ‘qualified enough’ for, it’s easy for self-doubt to overshadow all the progress you’ve already made.

But in this post, I don’t want to discuss the fears we have associated with academics per se.  There’s a tonne of resources already out there; homeschool groups, online forums and support both in person and online that’s available to all of us thus those fears can be put to rest pretty quickly.

The apprehension I want to discuss is the apprehension we as mothers face when it comes to teaching our children their faith, and the niggling feeling you get in this case is…

exactly the same.

However, I think its fair to say that mothers that are more susceptible to this are perhaps sisters who are reverts, who still feel they themselves are finding their own feet so wouldn’t know where to begin with teaching their children.  Or perhaps sisters from  ‘non-practising’ families, who are also trying to perfect their own foundations.

Whatever the case may be, our belief that we ‘don’t know enough’ can lead us becoming apprehensive of teaching our children, and we begin to question our decision to homeschool in the first place.   So we google search local Islamic schools, thinking it would be better if someone else took that role, whilst we can continue to ‘find our feet’.

But the reality is, we are never going to be knowledgeable enough.  Seeking knowledge is a lifelong journey, it never stops. And rather than viewing homeschooling or teaching our children in general as a halt on that journey, why not use it to our advantage?

Why don’t we become students alongside our children?  Let us allow that desire to learn and strengthen our faith to be intertwined with teaching our children.

Because it’s all too easy to have the mindset of

‘Well, my time to learn has passed. Now its time to focus on my children and give them the strong foundation that I didn’t have.’

But that doesnt have to be done at an arms length.  Join in!

Build your own foundation whilst building theirs.  Teach them general concepts, whilst they’re young.  And then utilise the time you have until they are ready for more detailed concepts to delve deeper yourself, so when they are of age you feel more equipped.

If you haven’t memorised much of the Qur’an yet, memorise with your kiddos, there’s no shame!  In fact, it’s a good thing for our children to see our continued efforts of actively seeking knowledge.  I remember reading about a sister who was homeschooling her eight children and memorised Qur’an alongside teaching them, how inspirational subhanAllah!

And I’d like to clarify that I don’t mean we shouldn’t get our children teachers etc.  That is definitely beneficial.  What I mean is that we shouldn’t feel that our learning journeys should stop in order for us to start our children on the path to seeking knowledge.  Or that there is shame in not knowing everything.

I mean, what better time to start??